Sunday, January 31, 2010

Another Sleepless Night

I flipped from my right side to my back, back to my right side, carefully (so as not to mess up my tattoo) to my left side, then to my stomach. I sighed in frustration and sat up to untangle the sheets from my legs. There was no getting comfortable tonight; no sleeping either. I looked at the clock. 1:45 AM. "Shit," i whispered to myself. "I have to get up in the morning too..." My stomach growled; i smiled.
My closet door slowly creaked open. I watched it, wishing i didn't know what to expect. C's chubby little face peeked around the door. "Guess who's hiding in your closet," she giggled.
I was not amused. "What do you want?"
"A binge buddy," she answered simply. "I know i can always convince you, especially on sleepless nights."
I shook my head. "No, not tonight you won't."
Her eyebrows raised. "Is that a fact?" she said slyly. "What if i hand you this peanut butter jar and give you a spoon?" She proceeded to do just that.
I groaned and put the monstrosity down. "Don't make me wake Ana," i threatened.
"Oh please," she scoffed. "You won't. You'll join me like you always do."
"Are you willing to chance that?" i challenged. "Go the fuck away."
She sniffed. "What? You hate me now?"
"I always have," i replied, reaching over to shake Ana's bony shoulder and wake her up.
"No!" C said quickly. "Please, Jo, don't wake her... I'll go."
And just that easily she was gone. I wondered why i had never been able to do that before. It was so easy this time... I closed my eyes and finally fell asleep.


  1. GOOD JOB WITH THE CONTROL! :D absolutely amazing.

  2. Ah, I LOVE this!!! Your imagery is, as always, impeccable. Such beautiful writing.

    And I'm so happy, so proud of you for your ability to resist that way. Fuck me if I can EVER resist goddamned peanut butter. Shit.

    You're awesome. Keep it up, lovely. We're going to make it. <3

  3. Great job, you're in control now!

  4. It's amazing how well you portray the temptation! Sometimes it feels like I have no say in whether or not I binge- thanks so much for reassuring me.
    And your resistance is awesome :)

  5. Way to be my dear. Insomnia is no fun. I like taking baths when I can't sleep


  6. I'm glad you were able to resist!!! C should just die!!!

  7. Ok hun, first off you are so gud at writing and trust me I kno, I've been writing for years just not as brave as you to post especially so honestly and vivid and creatively....second!!! Congrats on beating that binge here if you need to chat xx

  8. See? I knew you could do it!!! I'm so happy for you!! =)

  9. Amazing control darling (: Keep it up
    Aimee x