Monday, June 27, 2011

Finally Back!

Hey everyone. Sorry i was gone for so long... i've just been so lazy lately, not wanting to walk down to the library in the heat and in clothes that don't fit me, but i finally got my ass moving, and i can now tell you all the things that i have to tell you! There's so much...
First off, i'll start with something really simple: i finally got some maternity clothes! Yay! They're all hand-me-downs from people i know, but hey, it's better than nothing. I really can't complain just because none of them are really my style considering they were all free.. Besides, finding maternity clothes in my style is impossible anyway. Do any of you happen to know any websites where i can find some alternative/punk/goth maternity clothes? I tried googling it and didn't find much. If you have better luck, let me know. I just want to buy one really cute maternity outfit because sometime soon Jesse and i are going to have our pictures done professionally while i have this baby bump. I think that should be kinda cute, and definitely unique... what do you all think?
Now, the exciting news. I found out what my baby is! AND it's a girl!!! Just like Jesse and i were both hoping. I would post the ultrasound pictures on here, but the CD that has them on it is still in the car, which of course Jesse has. But i'll try to get motivated and get down here again to post them soon. At least we're pretty sure it's a girl... she had her legs crossed being all modest. Haha. But from what we could tell, she's a she. I'm pretty excited to start buying some pink stuff now! :) We found that out exactly a week ago, and at that point the doctor told us she weighed just under 2 lbs. We got to see her little hands and feet and a 3D image of her face too. So exciting. I'm ready to see her for real now!
Oh, and by the middle of July, Jesse and i should either have our own place or have the money to get it anyway. His new job is really helping out quite a bit, and we're both selling whatever we can to try to scrape up the money. We found some places open now that we're hoping will still be open when we have the money for the security deposits... keep your fingers crossed for me!
Other than that, there's really not a whole lot going on. I spend most of my days just reading a book or working on my cross stitch--which is actually quite an addictive hobby for me. It's difficult for me to put that down once i pick it up. Good thing i've got two more to do once i finish this first one! I think i really do need to be a bit more active... It's just so difficult for me right now because i feel so enormous, and my bones are not used to supporting that extra weight, so something is always aching, especially my hip that was massively fucked up by the car accident. I mean, fortunately all the weight i have gained is in my belly and my boobies...and a teeny tiny bit on my butt, so it should all come off easily after the baby comes, but ugh i'm huge!! And being big like that makes me want to hide away and never go out, even if it is obviously pregnacy. I guess that doesn't make much sense, does it? But it's just how i feel.
Oh well, off to try to catch up on all of your lovely blogs now. Love to you all, and thank you for all the comments! They always make me smile. :) Only 3 more months until i can post pictures of my baby outside of my belly!!

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Brief Update

In 13 days i will know if my baby is a boy or a girl. Can't wait! Then in the beginning of October, i'll find out what my baby looks like outside of my belly. That i really really can't wait for. But thinking of popping the baby out makes me wonder, how long will it take to lose whatever weight i've put on that isn't baby, placenta, and extra water? Will it be more than a month? Especially since i'm going to be breast feeding and can't hop right back on the Ana train instantly? I'm tired of being fat... I know it's because of the baby, and i'm not considering not eating or anything else that would be harmful to the baby, but i'm just so tired of not being able to fit into my clothes.
I guess it doesn't help much that i don't have the money to buy some maternity clothes that will actually fit me, thanks to my dickhead ex boss. He's not going to easily pay my unemployment, of course since he's such a tightwad, so i've got to file an appeal and hope for the best. It's just the reason i wanted to get the unemployment was so we'd have enough money to get by until jesse starts gettin his good paychecks from his new job, and since i've got to file an appeal and wait for all of that to be processed, the unemployment really isn't going to help much with that. He's such an asshole. Seriously, you fired a pregnant woman AND her husband on the same day and you won't even cut her a break and let her collect unemployment. Be considerate for once in your life!
Sorry... I'm just so friggin' tired. I've been getting 3 to 4 hours of sleep every night on average because my body hurts so bad from sleeping on the floor, and i can't take any pain meds to help out with that. The only thing i'm allowed to take while pregnant is Tylonol, and that doesn't do a single thing when my entire lower body is screaming in pain and keeping me awake. Last night i woke jesse up because i was crying from being exhausted and hurting so much. I just don't know what to do. I already asked the doctor if they could give me anything, and they said no, but i can't take this shit!
Oh dear, my brief update is more like a long sobfest... Do forgive me, lovelies. I'll try to find the incentive to walk my lazy ass down to the library again tomorrow and give you the thinspos you requested. I love you all, and i'm beyond grateful to those of you who manage to read through all of my whiney posts. xoxo

Friday, June 3, 2011

Thinspo? Not Really... But Still Pretty

Peridot gave me an awesome idea on my last post when i asked for thinspo requests. She told me to post pictures of pregnant celebrities. I was a bit wary at first because i really don't see how anyone can look good while pregnant, but i still googled it, and i found out that they really are still beautiful. I don't think i'm as beautiful as them... but then i don't have all that photo editing either. Lol. Thought i'd share the some of the pics i found with you all as well as a picture of my belly with jesse loving on the unborn baby (that's the first one, obviously). Maybe sometime soon i'll even get the nerve to post a picture of my baby bump where you can actually see my face.... Maybe... But thanks, Peri, for actually making me feel like i can still be pretty while prego.

Stealthy, i will do the scenespo post for you next.... You might wanna leave me a reminder though. My memory sucks. :D

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Thinspo Requests?

I'm planning on doing some thinspo posts here really soon to help inspire you all right now, and to help inspire me later on. Any requests as to thinspo themes you'd like to see?