I stared blankly at the scrambled eggs jumping in the frying pan. "Put cinnamon in them," Ana suggested. "Cinnamon boosts the metabolism."
I nodded and obeyed. It might taste alright, but if not, who really cared? When they had sufficiently browned, I put them into a bowl and grabbed a fork. Then i went to the table and continued blankly staring at the steaming mess that i was supposed to put in my mouth. "You could always throw them out," Ana whispered in my ear.
I shook my head. "Shaun wouldn't like that very much."
"Jo, you've been listening to Shaun for three days now. Just tell him that you messed up today, and listen to me. JUST ONE DAY! Please," she begged.
"Oh, Ana," i murmured. Her words sounded so good. "But what will Shaun say?"
"I've got a prior claim! I've been with you so much longer."
"What about Jacob?"
"I've been with you longer than he has too," Ana stated.
"But you're one person, telling me to do something that a lot of people are telling me not to do."
"Then don't tell anyone."
I raised my eyebrows. "I can't lie to everyone."
"Don't lie... unless you're asked. Even then you can say that you made food without saying you ate it. Don't initiate conversation about food. Come on, Jo, you know the tricks. You know how to hide all this; you've done it before a million times."
I shuddered. I wanted to listen to her so badly... I wanted to do exactly what she said. I wanted to fast and fast. (Apparently nothing is as good for curbing the appetite as being allowed to eat.) I picked up my bowl of now-cold eggs and... took a bite.
Ana shrieked. "What the fuck?!"
It broke my heart, but i took another bite. "I'll work it off, Ana, i promise. I'll do another hour of working out, i swear, but i have to do this. I have to do this for Shaun, and Jacob, and Pastor Pete, and my mom."
A tear rolled down her cheek and splattered all over the shiny surface of the table; my own tear soon joined it.