Thursday, July 23, 2009

A Little Bit of Bone

"Wow. Ana, come look at this!"
She stepped into my room and came over to where i stood in front of the mirror. "Ooooh, is that...?"
I smiled proudly and nodded. "Ribcage, baby!"
Ana frowned skeptically. "Only when you raise your arms though."
"But that's a huge improvement over 4 days ago," i insisted. I wasn't going to let her criticism squash my excitement. "And it's bones! I can see bones!"
She laughed. "All right, all right," she consented. "I suppose it is an excellent thing."
"And look at my hands; they're thinner. Don't you think?"
"Hmm, don't get too cocky now," she warned.
"But look! That bone sort of pokes up out t of my wrist. It never did before."
"Ok, sure, you're losing, but take a side view of yourself in this mirror."
I bit my lip hard but obeyed. My stomach still disappointed me, even though it was gurgling. My butt and thighs were still too big. My arms, huge. My good mood? Gone in a flash. "I'm not skinny..." i murmured sadly.
Ana patted my fatty shoulder. "Not yet."
Through all my disappointment, i found a way to smile. Her words were meant as a promise. I would be skinny eventually. Right now i just had to keep on carefully following her rules. I turned around and hugged her bony body close to me. "Don't ever leave me, Ana."
And she made me a second promise: "I won't."


  1. Thats hauntingly beautiful
    and eerily horrid at the same time.

    I love it.

  2. Ugh, this is exactly how I feel. I was so proud yesterday - I went running, I ate less than 600 calories, I dropped 2 pounds in 2 days.... but as I lay in bed that night, I had to fight the urge to get up and exercise some more. Ana's a cruel mistress.

  3. I love that bone that sticks out in my hand/wrist, too.