Saturday, September 19, 2009

Forced Binge

My stomach gurgled as hunger pangs ran unrelentingly throughout it. I stared in bewilderment at the oatmeal i'd made myself for breakfast. Somehow the thought of putting it into my mouth was just repulsive. I searched the kitchen in vain for something that i would be able to stomach. Nothing.
Ana's hand on my shoulder made me smile. "No food, sweetie," she whispered.
My stomach growled it's protest, but i couldn't even fathom disobeying her. Food was disgusting. "No food," i repeated and took myself to work, where i promptly skipped lunch.
Once i was home from work, i still felt the same. I fried up an egg and tried to eat it, only to find myself throwing half of it away. "I haven't thrown away this much food in ages," i said in a state of confused bliss as i dumped my plate into the garbage can.
"I'm proud of you," Ana told me, kissing my cheek.
Dinner, however was not to be skipped so easily. "We're having friends over tonight," my mom informed me. "And we're going to be making mountain pies."
Mountain pies... My mental Calorie counter took off, with Ana helping it. Two pieces of bread (110) with pizza sauce (30), cheese (60) and pepperoni (30) in between them = 230 Calories for one. No doubt, i'd be forced to eat at least two of those = 460 Calories. Plus desert, a fruit filled mountain pie equaling out to 210. That was 670 Calories for everything!
"Insanity," Ana shouted.
I was the only one who heard her. Everyone else just ate without caring, and begged me to eat more. "No, i'm full. Really i am. I think i'm about to burst, actually," i said over and over. Still, i felt as if i'd failed. Nearly 700 Calories was too much for just one meal.
"Sorry, Ana," i whispered.
"What'd you say?" my mom asked.
"Hmm? What? I didn't say anything," was my reply.

3 comments:

  1. you look beautiful in your photos babe. keep up the good work. dont give in

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  2. mountain pies ... i have no idea what that is but i never ever want to know. that amount of calories sounds horrible.
    I am sorry you had to eat all this. But then again you did really well with throwing most of the food away during the day!

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  3. i really like the way you use words. :)
    annd mountain pies, my mom makes something like that sometimes, and they are huge and sometimes disgusing, ickk. ha.

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